Love Life At School (Chapter Thirty Three)

He leaned closer to her. His eyelids closed slowly as he got closer to her. And he felt a hard slap on his face. He opened his eyes wide and stared at her.

In return, she looked fiercely at him. She was angry, absolutely angry. Not because he tried to kiss her, but because he wanted to before he redeemed himself from his mistake. She couldn’t forgive and forget. It was a case of remembering and being heart broken forever, even when bodies rot and decay. Even if time stands still or when it is the end of the world, she would never forget him or the mistake. She loved him for who he was but at the same time she hated him for the same reason.

She could feel safe and secured when he was around in the past. But now, she felt an extra feeling, unfaithful. She just could not get the scene out of her head when he kissed Rainie. She wanted him out of her life now. Se couldn’t stand being with a person who had been unfaithful to her.

“What are you trying to do?” she asked, although she knew the reason.

“I..I want to have you back. I’d do anything. Anything. Just tell me what to do, I’ll do it,” Arron looked at her seriously.

“Get lost from my life. It’s already messed up and does not need you to worsen it,” Hebe said, angrily.

“Hebe, please. Let us start afresh. Lets forget all that happened ad be together again,” Arron looked at her hopefully.

Hebe couldn’t say a word. She loved the way he said things and moved. She loved his eyes, his shining eyes which now had lost its shine and spark. She loved his company and loved the way he spoke to her in a gentle way. She loved the way he would hug her and give her a sense of security. And most importantly, she loved him.

At that moment, her body did not budge. Her head was practically screaming at her to run away, to not bother him anymore. But her heart merely whispered to her to hug him, to want him back. She wanted to follow her heart, but her head kept having flashbacks of him and Rainie. She just couldn’t get herself to do what her heart desires. She was heart broken.

Her eyes felt heavy. She didn’t know what to do. She was simply rooted to the spot and couldn’t bear to look him in the eye. She looked at the floor with tears threatening to flow out if she dared to blink. But she could no longer hold it back. Without even blinking, they flowed down her face, drop by drop.

Arron had been looking at her the whole time. He too didn’t know what to do and he didn’t seem to be able to fathom her thoughts. When he saw her cry, he couldn’t think. He looked at her as tears also welled up in his eyes. He had loved her so. He wanted her to be happy. But he wanted her by his side too. He grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her towards him to hug her.

Hebe felt herself being pulled towards Arron. But she wasn’t able to gather the strength to pull herself away. She had forgotten how it was to be hugged by someone, especially when that someone was Arron. She had forgotten how warm his hug was. How safe and secured she used to feel when she was in his arms. Now, she couldn’t hold herself back. She missed the smell of his hair and clothes. She missed the way he emitted warmth. She missed everything about him. She missed him.

But instantly, images of him and Rainie being together appeared. Him and Rainie holding hands. Him and Rainie hugging. And... him and Rainie kissing.

She immediately pushed him away. Indeed she wanted to be with him and forget all that happened. But her head did not let her. It seemed to be whispering to her not to let go of those memories, not to be with him, not to free herself from the flashbacks and sad memories.

“Let me go,” Hebe said, her voice slightly shivering.

“Hebe, please. Give me another chance. I’ll do anything for you, Hebe. Just give me a chance,” Arron sounded miserable.

“I’ve given you one chance too many. It wasn’t me who didn’t give you chances. It was yourself who didn’t realize them and let go. So how do you deem you are fit to get another chance?”

“Hebe, I know I was wrong. I could never forgive myself for hurting you. I’m really sorry.”

Without saying a single word, Hebe turned away and started walking off when Arron grabbed her left hand. She stopped in her tracks but didn’t turn around. She couldn’t face him. She was afraid if she looked at him, even at one glance, she wouldn’t be able to walk away.

“Hebe, I really am sorry for what I did. I never meant to hurt you. I’ve always loved you. Always. And I will never stop loving you. Not now, not in the future, not forever.”

Hebe did not utter a single word. She did not trust herself to speak. She was afraid to say the wrong thing. She debated in her mind. Whether or not she should forgive him. Her mind was in a whirl. Her once strong unbending ice wall decision of not forgiving Arron now seemed to have melted from his words.

Suddenly, she heard a thud behind her. She turned a little to look. She gasped.

Arron had went on his knees to beg her. To hope she would forgive him and love him as she once had. Tears rolled from his eyes which were now red and sad.

“Hebe, would you forgive me?”

She saw his eyes pleading with every ounce of energy he had left. She couldn’t bear to say no. But she had to stand firm in her decision. She replaced the picture in her mind of him at that moment with him and Rainie. It was the only reason she knew would help her to not give him a chance.

She braced herself with a deep breath and shook his hand off hers. With tears still streaming down her face, she walked out of the room, not once bothering the urge to look back at him.

-brenda, co-written with ratana-